Friday, July 27, 2007

Pulling My Hair Out

Potty training.


Some mornings the kid wakes up bone dry and goes right to the potty and pees in it. once he even woke up in the middle of the night and called for me because he had to go. Then went again in the morning. I thought we had to be almost there!

Then there are the other days. He acts like he has to pee, then when you get him to the potty, you find out he has just gone in his diaper. You sit him on the potty and make him sit there 5 minutes and nothing happens. As soon as you put the diaper back on, 5 minutes after that he's totally wet, and has probably pooped too.

Finally there are the days like today. If I so much as ask, "Trevor, do you need to pee-pee potty?", he runs away and hides, then races into the bathroom and tries to flush the toilet without being caught, then races back out. Laughing wildly the entire time. I honestly think he's doing it on purpose. You know, playing games with me.

Well, I already knew he has selective hearing and very selective memory, so I guess selective wetting his pants is to be expected.

Insight anyone?

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Deep Thoughts

Do you ever just wonder about random, insignificat little things until they drive you crazy? I do. Let me give you an example.

Recently, I was driving home from work and listening to the radio. A song by the Eagles came on, and as I sang along (don't worry, I was by myself), it triggered something that has bugged me for well over a decade. It bugs me every time I hear the song.

The song in question is "Lyin' Eyes". There is a part that goes:

She rushes to his arms, they fall together/ she whispers that it's only for a while/ she swears that soon she'll be comin' back forever/ she pulls away and leaves him with a smile.

Now, does she pull away and leave with a smile on her face, or does she pull away and leave him with a smile on his face. When you listen to the way they actually sing that line, with the emphasis, it really could go either way

Opinions anyone?


Monday, July 09, 2007

A Very Proliferative Little Town.

I'm referring to a little town in Texas called Dumas. So you will understand what I am talking about, here's the back story:

I went to a local McDonald's the other day and, as is my norm, I used the drive-thru. I ordered a chicken caesar salad with extra croutons and extra dressing. The girl asked me if I wanted the chicked grilled or crispy (read: fried). I told her I would like it grilled.

On the little "confirm your order" screen appears: "Bacon Ranch Salad Crispy, 2 Croutons"

I said, "Excuse me, but I ordered a caesar salad with grilled chicken, extra croutons and extra dressing."

"Oh." Pause. "OK."

After a couple seconds the little screen changed to read "Caesar Salad Grilled, 2 Croutons, 2 Dressing"

I thought, "Great! Now we're getting somewhere."

I drove around and paid. When they handed me the bag with the salad in it, I looked inside. I saw 2 crouton packs, one pack of ranch dressing, and a salad in a plastic container with a lid on it. The girl at the window (a different girl, mind you) said, "Oh wait, I think I gave you the wrong salad." I agreed and gave it back.

She took it somewhere inside where all 4 or 5 employees on duty proceeded to have a discussion about it. I heard bits like "what's that?", "what'd she order?" , "Is this a caesar salad?", "it's grilled chicken", "that IS what she ordered, see?", and other snippets along that line.

Girl #2 came back to the window and asked, "Ma'am, did you order a caesar salad?"

I said, "yeeeeeesssss." (in a tone that hinted, ever so slightly, "you moron!")

She smiled sweetly at me and said real nice, like I was the stupid one, "Well, this is a caesar salad."

I took a deep breath and said, "That may well be. I didn't examine the salad itself. But the dressing in there is ranch, and I wanted caesar dressing. Plus, I ordered 2 of them, not just 1."

She said, "I'll just switch out the dressing!" She removed the one packet of ranch dressing, then proceeded to dig around in my bag for a couple more minutes. She finally looked up and said, "Where's the other one?" I patiently explained that there was only one in the bag - that was, in fact, part of the problem.

I can't imagine a crew of random strangers each being that dumb. They must have migrated from Dumas as a group and somehow taken over a fast food franchise.

Watch out, your town could be next!